I decided I would let James stay with me until things had
died down a bit. I felt good helping him out however I did feel slightly
nervous. If that guy Rodger was as crazy as James had described him to be, what
would stop him finding out where I live and coming round here? I knew it was a
risk but it was worth it, I couldn't let James go back to his smashed up
apartment with all the memories.
“I’m going to look for a new apartment…” James said as he sat down in front of the TV. He had just cooked me the most amazing lasagna as a thank you for letting him stay here.
“Oh, really?” I smiled.
“Yeah, I mean I really don’t wanna go back there, Rodger knows where I live, I’m scared he will try to get me back.”
“I think that’s a good idea James, Billie and I will go over there and give it a good clean up before you try selling it,” I smiled.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea too, I've also taken some personal time off work,” he smiled, sipping from his glass of red wine.
“But don’t rush, I want you to feel ready first,” I said softly. He smiled, his attention now on the TV.
“James….” I said nervously.
“Yeah babe?” He replied, still focused on the TV.
“I… I need to talk to you about something…” He then looked at me.
“What’s up?” He asked. I had been thinking about telling him for ages, I thought if anyone knows how I'm feeling right now it would be James, after all he must have been confused about his sexuality at one point.
“I, I kissed a girl!” I burst. He looked a little shocked and then started laughing.
“You did what?!”
“My neighbour, she practically jumped on me! But we kissed and I kinda… enjoyed it? But then she went too far and I stopped!”
“Woah, woah, slow down honey, so this girl started kissing you and you let her but then she did what?”
“She put… James! I feel so awkward talking about this, she put her hand down my pants…”
“Wow, what a slut,” James said raising his eye brow.
“Who? Me? No I stopped her!” I said defensively.
“Hush! I’m joking okay? You kissed a girl and you liked it, so what?” he laughed.
“But… now I feel guilty… I threw her out after!” I said.
“Scarlett! That’s harsh, from what you’re saying you did kind of lead her on…”
“But, I didn't mean to!” I felt like crying, “I was curious, yeah I let her kiss me but… oh god James, I feel so bad… and confused!”
“Are you confused about your sexuality?” He asked softly.
“Well after, yes! But now, after having time to think about it, no, I don’t think I am, I like guys, I love guys, I couldn't imagine myself being with a woman and even though kissing one was fun I don’t think I’d want to do it again.” I replied sternly.
“Besides that... she’s engaged.” I then said.
“Right okay, maybe you were right to throw her out…” he then laughed, “but as soon as she kissed you, you should have said no Scarlett, If you seemed like you enjoyed it, she might have thought you wanted to carry on” He said sternly. I nodded.
“Should I tell her fiancé?” I asked, biting my bottom lip.
“That’s tough.”
“I think she might have cheated on him before though, I mean she didn't hold back…I just get the feeling she doesn't really love him,” I said softly.
“Well then it’s your call,” he replied shrugging. I guess it really was my call. To be honest I didn't really know the guy and there was a possibility I’d never even talk to him again. But I decided if we ever did talk and there was a chance for me to tell him I probably should warn him, that’s the right thing to do, right?
“I’m going to look for a new apartment…” James said as he sat down in front of the TV. He had just cooked me the most amazing lasagna as a thank you for letting him stay here.
“Oh, really?” I smiled.
“Yeah, I mean I really don’t wanna go back there, Rodger knows where I live, I’m scared he will try to get me back.”
“I think that’s a good idea James, Billie and I will go over there and give it a good clean up before you try selling it,” I smiled.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea too, I've also taken some personal time off work,” he smiled, sipping from his glass of red wine.
“But don’t rush, I want you to feel ready first,” I said softly. He smiled, his attention now on the TV.
“James….” I said nervously.
“Yeah babe?” He replied, still focused on the TV.
“I… I need to talk to you about something…” He then looked at me.
“What’s up?” He asked. I had been thinking about telling him for ages, I thought if anyone knows how I'm feeling right now it would be James, after all he must have been confused about his sexuality at one point.
“I, I kissed a girl!” I burst. He looked a little shocked and then started laughing.
“You did what?!”
“My neighbour, she practically jumped on me! But we kissed and I kinda… enjoyed it? But then she went too far and I stopped!”
“Woah, woah, slow down honey, so this girl started kissing you and you let her but then she did what?”
“She put… James! I feel so awkward talking about this, she put her hand down my pants…”
“Wow, what a slut,” James said raising his eye brow.
“Who? Me? No I stopped her!” I said defensively.
“Hush! I’m joking okay? You kissed a girl and you liked it, so what?” he laughed.
“But… now I feel guilty… I threw her out after!” I said.
“Scarlett! That’s harsh, from what you’re saying you did kind of lead her on…”
“But, I didn't mean to!” I felt like crying, “I was curious, yeah I let her kiss me but… oh god James, I feel so bad… and confused!”
“Are you confused about your sexuality?” He asked softly.
“Well after, yes! But now, after having time to think about it, no, I don’t think I am, I like guys, I love guys, I couldn't imagine myself being with a woman and even though kissing one was fun I don’t think I’d want to do it again.” I replied sternly.
“Besides that... she’s engaged.” I then said.
“Right okay, maybe you were right to throw her out…” he then laughed, “but as soon as she kissed you, you should have said no Scarlett, If you seemed like you enjoyed it, she might have thought you wanted to carry on” He said sternly. I nodded.
“Should I tell her fiancé?” I asked, biting my bottom lip.
“That’s tough.”
“I think she might have cheated on him before though, I mean she didn't hold back…I just get the feeling she doesn't really love him,” I said softly.
“Well then it’s your call,” he replied shrugging. I guess it really was my call. To be honest I didn't really know the guy and there was a possibility I’d never even talk to him again. But I decided if we ever did talk and there was a chance for me to tell him I probably should warn him, that’s the right thing to do, right?
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