A Little Bit Of Me Time.

It’s Saturday! Finally, I could not believe how long these last couple of days have felt. I decided to spend some time alone and hit the gym for a couple of hours. I made myself some banana oatmeal cookies, they are healthy and super easy to make, all you need to do is mash a banana, add oats, bake in the oven and tada! You have a super yummy AND healthy breakfast, I can be healthy too when I want to be, don’t let all that fast food fool you! I was just finishing up at the gym when I got a call from Billie asking to go out tonight. I was thinking of asking Ace out tonight but I couldn't let her down.

When I got back from the gym and after showering and changing I decided I would go out and treat myself. I decided to have my hair re-dip dyed which looked amazing, my hair is naturally a very dark brown colour and can sometimes feel  boring and dull so having a change really made me feel more confident and sexy. The ends of my hair were now a caramel blonde and I couldn't wait to show Billie latter. I also decided to get a massage and facial which I rarely bothered with but working out and all the friend and work related stress made me feel like I needed some pampering' I was tempted to get my nails done too but working with animals and having long nails wasn't a good idea I told myself. After that I done a bit of clothes shopping. I grabbed myself quite a few bargains which made me feel good, I hated spending full price on things. Finally, before returning home I also done a bit of grocery shopping.

When I came through the door of my apartment I noticed James had gone out. I felt it was kinda weird that he didn't even tell me or leave a note but I shrugged it off thinking he’s probably just gone back to his place to get his stuff or something. It was almost time to meet Billie so I decided to get ready. I picked out a black and cream polka dot collared shirt and some tight fitting black jeans. I went for the highest heels I had which made me legs look crazy long. I was just transferring my purse from my everyday handbag to a different one which I used when I went out when I heard my phone buzz.
“Hey Scarlett,” Billie said.

“Hey, I’m feeling like Italian,” I grinned.

“Mmm, yes!” she smiled, obviously feeling the same.

We met at this small little Italian restaurant which we knew did the best tiramisu. Billie looked a little run down however when she saw me her face lit up and she smiled. “Scarlett, you look great!” she said, giving me a huge hug.

“I treated myself,” I smiled, holding up the ends of my hair.

“Ooo,” she smiled, “I like it!” Billie had lighter brown hair which was naturally super curly and I envied her so much, she never had to worry about it looking flat or dull because she always had perfect natural curls. She also was very tanned which I also envied, but she often said she would do anything to have my paler skin, why do women always want what they don’t have?!

Billie and I sat down and ordered ourselves some red wine. Once it arrived we begun talking.
“So, is James okay?” she asked taking a huge gulp.

“Yeah, he’s fine, he’s still looking for a new place though,” I smiled. She nodded. “But its weird, he wasn't there when I came home today he’s been acting funny recently I was gonna talk to you about it,” I told her.

“What? You’re meant to be keeping an eye on him scarlet!” She suddenly exclaimed. I looked at her confused. “I thought you would look after him not let him stray again!” she sighed angrily.

“But what am I meant to do? Ban him from leaving the house? He’s a grown man Bills,” I argued.

“Yes but, he didn't leave a note, a text, nothing?” I shook my head. I could see she was about to lay into me so I was glad when the waitress came to ask us what we wanted to order. I decided to go for goat’s cheese and roasted tomato pizza while Billie ordered spaghetti Bolognese.

“So, how are things with you?” I asked quickly after the waitress left. She looked down at the table cloth.

“Well… I wanted to talk to you about something,” she said softly.

“Oh, what is it?” I asked feeling concerned.

“You remember Freddy Parker?” she asked. I nodded remembering how they had been re-united on Boxing Day after not seeing each other since high school.

“Well after Boxing day we begun texting and it was fun but then he started getting all serious so I told him I wasn't interested in him and he started  texting even more, all day and night saying how sorry he is and whatever…” she then reached down into her bag and pulled out her phone. “Look,” she said passing it over to me. I looked down at the screen and she wasn't even exaggerating. There were hundreds of texts from Freddy begging and pleading her to talk to him.

“Wow, Billie, I mean, I don’t know what to say,” I replied, my mouth dry.

“Well nor do I! I thought he would get the idea and stop but well he hasn't, I didn't even lead him on or anything! He said he’s gonna show up at my apartment and wait for me to talk to him, Scarlett he said he’s in love with me…” I was listening to her while scrolling down the never ending roll of messages.

“Bills, I… I’m gonna call him, I’m gonna tell him to back off!” I suddenly said just as the waitress came over with our order. She placed our pates down and gave me a funny look before scurrying off again.

“Scarlett you don’t need to I promise, I’m really not threatened by him, he’s Freddy Parker for god sake! He just thinks he’s irresistible now he’s turned good looking but no, he’s still a weirdo and I still DON’T like him,” she said taking her phone back and putting it back into her bag. I smiled and begun to eat my food.

“Ugh I just don’t know how I get myself into this mess,” she then moaned stabbing her fork into her spaghetti with a slight smile.

“Neither do I…” I laughed, cutting into my pizza. I’m glad it didn't bother her too much but I did feel so angry, why was Freddy being like this?

“Why can’t I find myself a decent man, are there even any decent men left? Because I can’t find them,” she huffed.

“I know how you feel…” I smiled.

“But you have Ace! And he sounds really great, and now you have that Jake guy, I mean he sounds kinda desperate but at least he’s sort of normal!” I laughed.  “And you know maybe it was romantic, girl he must be crazy about you right?” she laughed.

“I don’t know,” I smiled, “but we will see how it goes,” I smiled.

“You’re totally going on a date with him aren't you!” she exclaimed. I couldn't help but blush.

“Maybe, I can tell I won’t like him, he’s not my type,” I shrugged eating a mouth full of pizza.

“Well, see how it goes right? I’m still rooting for Ace though,” she grinned.

“Me too,” I smiled.

Billie and I ended the night by sharing a huge tiramisu, I was glad I’d gone to the gym now. After we had paid we decided to go straight home both of us too tired to go anywhere else.

“Bye, call me if the whole Freddy situation gets any worse okay?” I smiled getting out of the taxi. She nodded with a smile.

“And you call me if James is still not there, she replied. I waved and walked up the stairs to my apartment building. As I opened the door I could feel someone watching me.

Is It Obvious?

“This place looks like a bombs hit it,” Billie groaned  standing in the middle of James's apartment.
“More like Rodger hit it…” I muttered opening up the black bin bag I was holding. “Right, this bag’s for rubbish,” I said holding up one bag, “and this one is for all of James’s clothes.” I said holding up the other bag. Billie nodded.
“What about all his bits and bobs?” Billie asked looking around.
“Well once we've cleaned up and brought him back some new clothes he can come here and sort that out himself.”

About an hour later we finished. I had wiped down all of his kitchen work tops and mopped the floor. Billie had sorted out all of his clothes and also packed his tooth brush and other essentials. We were just finishing up and about to leave when Billie stopped still.
“What?” I asked noticing her turn pale.
“Scarlett did you close that door?” she asked. I looked over.
“Nope,” I shrugged.
“Well I told you I opened it so I could air the place out!” she snapped.
“Ok, Ok,!” I walked towards the door and opened it, “Its open now, see? Now come on, I’m gonna be late for work.” Billie looked reluctant but she finally nodded and walked out. As the door slammed behind me I felt a chill down my spine.

Work was slow today so I decided I’d talk to Michael. I felt a bit silly for storming out like I did when I think back to it.
“Hey Michael,” I smiled. He nodded. “James is fine now…” I then said, standing awkwardly in the middle of the break room while he ate his lunch.
“That’s good Scarlett,” he nodded, not even looking up at me.
“Yes, it’s great,” I smiled. His attitude agitated me a little but I shrugged it off. “Michael I would like to apologize for storming out and well… shouting at you like I did last week…” He then looked up and was about to speak when I interrupted him. “I really like working with you and I don’t want to cause any tension between us, It’s just that I was upset and what you suggested me do was completely out of order.”
“Scarlett, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I just feel very strongly against drugs-“
“I do too! But I couldn't and wouldn't do that to him!”
“Scarlett just listen, its fine, there is no tension,” he said rolling his eyes.
“Fine, I get it,” I sighed walking back out of the room. How did I manage to make this situation worse? I spent the rest of the day sitting in reception with the receptionists. I talked to Amy about it and she said he has been grumpy and snappy with her all day too. Maybe something was up? Amy and I also decided to go out to dinner one day next week, I couldn't wait. I’d actually never been out with Amy before but I’m sure it would be fun. Amy is in her thirties and already has three small children. I love children so listening to her telling me stories when works slow makes me smile, especially how she talks so passionately about them, it's really cute.

When I got home James was sitting on the sofa watching TV. I slipped of my shoes and sat down on the sofa.
“Long day? James asked. I nodded. “Dinner is in the oven.” I quickly got up and opened up the oven door to a huge pot of bubbling casserole.
“James, do you want some?” I asked dishing it out.
“I err, I ate already,” he said quickly, “I actually don’t feel well, I’m gonna go to bed.” He quickly got up and disappeared into the bathroom.
“James, is everything okay?” I called after him, noticing he was acting strange. There was no reply.

Since I was now alone I decided I'd call Jake since after all I had told him i would. As I dialed his number and waited while it rang I had a feeling I was doing the wrong thing. 

 “Hey Jake its Scarlett,” I said.

“Scarlett?! Hey!” He replied.
“I just called to ask if you still wanted to go out sometime?” I asked casually.
“Sure, yes, when?” He asked, clearly eager.
“Erm, sometime next week? I'm busy this weekend,” I replied.
“Okay, sure, I'll text you okay? I'm really looking forward to it already,” I could tell he was smiling.
“Me too,” I smiled, lying. I did want to go on a date with him but I knew already I wouldn't like him enough for it to go anywhere else. I thought about Ace and signed, is it too obvious I’m totally in love with him?

Confession Time.

I decided I would let James stay with me until things had died down a bit. I felt good helping him out however I did feel slightly nervous. If that guy Rodger was as crazy as James had described him to be, what would stop him finding out where I live and coming round here? I knew it was a risk but it was worth it, I couldn't let James go back to his smashed up apartment with all the memories.

“I’m going to look for a new apartment…” James said as he sat down in front of the TV. He had just cooked me the most amazing lasagna as a thank you for letting him stay here.
“Oh, really?” I smiled.
“Yeah, I mean I really don’t wanna go back there, Rodger knows where I live, I’m scared he will try to get me back.”
“I think that’s a good idea James, Billie and I will go over there and give it a good clean up before you try selling it,” I smiled.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea too, I've also taken some personal time off work,” he smiled, sipping from his glass of red wine.
“But don’t rush, I want you to feel ready first,” I said softly. He smiled, his attention now on the TV.
“James….” I said nervously.
“Yeah babe?” He replied, still focused on the TV.
“I… I need to talk to you about something…” He then looked at me.
“What’s up?” He asked. I had been thinking about telling him for ages, I thought if anyone knows how I'm feeling right now it would be James, after all he must have been confused about his sexuality at one point.
“I, I kissed a girl!” I burst. He looked a little shocked and then started laughing.
“You did what?!”
“My neighbour, she practically jumped on me! But we kissed and I kinda… enjoyed it? But then she went too far and I stopped!”
“Woah, woah, slow down honey, so this girl started kissing you and you let her but then she did what?”
“She put… James! I feel so awkward talking about this, she put her hand down my pants…”
“Wow, what a slut,” James said raising his eye brow.
“Who? Me? No I stopped her!” I said defensively.
“Hush! I’m joking okay? You kissed a girl and you liked it, so what?” he laughed.
“But… now I feel guilty… I threw her out after!” I said.
“Scarlett! That’s harsh, from what you’re saying you did kind of lead her on…”
“But, I didn't mean to!” I felt like crying, “I was curious, yeah I let her kiss me but… oh god James, I feel so bad… and confused!”
“Are you confused about your sexuality?” He asked softly.
“Well after, yes! But now, after having time to think about it, no, I don’t think I am, I like guys, I love guys, I couldn't imagine myself being with a woman and even though kissing one was fun I don’t think I’d want to do it again.” I replied sternly.
“Besides that... she’s engaged.” I then said.
“Right okay, maybe you were right to throw her out…” he then laughed, “but as soon as she kissed you, you should have said no Scarlett, If you seemed like you enjoyed it, she might have thought you wanted to carry on” He said sternly. I nodded.
“Should I tell her fiancé?” I asked, biting my bottom lip.
“That’s tough.”
“I think she might have cheated on him before though, I mean she didn't hold back…I just get the feeling she doesn't really love him,” I said softly.
“Well then it’s your call,” he replied shrugging. I guess it really was my call. To be honest I didn't really know the guy and there was a possibility I’d never even talk to him again. But I decided if we ever did talk and there was a chance for me to tell him I probably should warn him, that’s the right thing to do, right?

Kinda Creepy.

I woke up the next morning with Billie in bed beside me and James on the sofa. I checked my phone and saw had a text message from Ace.

“Happy New Year! X”

I suddenly felt guilty. After seeing James in my apartment I couldn't think of anything else and I now felt bad for ignoring him. What if he was all alone on New Years because of me? I decided to give him a call.

“Hey,” I said after he picked up the phone, “It’s Scarlett.”
“Oh hey Scarlett, are you okay? What’s up?” He asked sounding concerned.
“I’m fine, I’m fine, I just wanted to say I’m sorry about last night.”
“Sorry? Why?” he asked.
“For making you leave, I didn't wanna seem rude, I am really sorry.”
“Listen Scarlet its fine, your friend’s safety more important than me, I’m just glad he’s okay.”
“Me too, do you... do you wanna go out sometime this weekend?” I asked trying to sound casual.
“Yeah, sure, going out with you is…. Fun,” he laughed.
“I promise it won’t end like something out of Eastenders this time.” I heard him laugh.
“Listen, I gotta go, works getting busy,” he said.
“Oh, you went into work early, that is brave!” I laughed, “I’m going in this afternoon, Ill text you what day we can go out, thank you for understanding.” I put the phone down to Ace then I heard Billie groan as she woke up.
“Morning sleeping beauty,” I laughed.
“Shh!” she moaned, covering her face with her hands. She had always been self-conscious of her face while she slept. “What time is it?” she asked sitting up.
“What the hell Billie you’re not even drunk!” I laughed, scrolling through my phone.
“I’m just tired okay! Works been mega crazy, that and James going missing has really messed up my sleep.”
Billie worked as a wedding organizer, we had always joked that I’d never let her plan my wedding after all the moaning she does about her clients.
“Go back to sleep then, I do have work in an hour or so though,” I reminded her as I walked into the kitchen. James was lying flat out on the sofa snoring. I laughed to myself, I had such lazy friends, but I realised now it was horrible living without them. I made some cereal and watched some morning TV. I was just getting ready for work when my phone buzzed. It was an unknown number. 

“Hey, who is this?” I asked.
“Hey, sorry, it’s me Jake… from the train we met on-“
“I remember… how did you get my number?” I asked remembering it was him who had given out his number.
“Right… this is gonna sound kind of weird but when I put my number into your phone an email notification popped up and I accidently clicked on it… I saw your name was Scarlet May and I managed to find you on Facebook, I found your number on there…”
“Right okay, that is kinda creepy,” I said, a bit freaked out.
“I know, but I really wanted to see you again, I knew you wasn’t gonna call me, girls I like never really do,” he laughed. I didn’t know whether to be flattered or put the phone down on him.
“Jake, I’m sorry I didn't call you, I wanted to its just so much has happened since meeting you, I didn't mean to give you the wrong-“
“Scarlett, it’s okay, I just wondered if you still wanted to go on that date I've been dreaming of?” He asked so sweetly I found myself saying yes.
As soon as I put the phone down I regretted it. The guy stalked my Facebook to get my number for god sake, why was my number even on Facebook?! I rushed to my computer and logged on. I scrolled down for ages until I noticed I’d written my phone number down as a comment on a distant family members status.
“Hey, what you doing, don’t you have work?” Billie asked walking out of the shower.
“Billie, would you be freaked out if a guy scrolled through months and months of posts and status’s on Facebook in order to find your number?” I asked. She nodded.
“For sure, I mean that’s borderline stalking,” she laughed, grabbing my hair dryer, “can I use this?” she asked holding it up. I nodded.
“But it could be romantic….?” I said.
“Hmm, nope, weird,” she laughed, “why?”
“There was this guy I met on the train to my parents, he gave me his number but I never called him, but he called me just now, he said he found my number on Facebook,” I told her.
“You put the phone down and told him to get a life right?”
“No… were going on a date actually,” I replied awkwardly.
“You’re joking right?” she burst, “you’re too soft, what about Ace? James had been telling he’s a great guy Scarlett!”
“Billie, Ace and I are just dating, it’s not serious… yet, it’s just a date! He isn’t even my type he’s blonde and cheesy,” I laughed.
“And how would you feel if Ace was dating another girl?” Billie asked. I thought about it, I would feel kinda jealous but we aren’t in a relationship I reminded myself.
“I’d be cool with that,” I shrugged. Billie looked as if she didn’t believe me. And she was probably right, I did really like Ace, he was my type, he had a great personality and I really did like being with him but still a part of me wanted to date other guys too…

After the whole James situation Michael and I hadn’t really spoken to eachother, apart from when we were working together. And today was the same. Work was kinda slow but the customers we had were super annoying. This one woman almost had a panic attack because she had to wait for 10 minutes before Michael and I could check her Chihuahua over, since when was a tick an emergency?
“Please can you just sit down?” I asked trying to keep my cool, “the vet can’t see you right now, he’s with a customer.”
“Well some people actually have things to do!” she screeched, “some people don’t have time to sit around in a waiting room!”
“But he’s busy!” I hissed, trying not to upset the other people in the surgery.
“I don’t care! Do you know how much my insurance costs, what if my little baby dies because your busy!”
“I assure you your dog will not die, he has a tick, the vet will get it out of him when he’s done with this customer.” I replied calmly.
“If you’re wrong young lady, don’t think for one minuet I won’t sue your little arse!” I looked at her as if she was crazy and nodded my head. “And also if they charge me for missing my hair appointment I will hold you personally responsible, do you understand that?” I nodded my head and ushered her away from the receptionist desk. About a minuet latter Michael came out. He has obviously heard all the shouting and asked me what was wrong.
“Just don’t make her wait any longer, or she’ll you know, sue us,” I laughed. He smiled and called out her name. As she walked past me she tried as hard as she could to knock me out of the way.
“Finally!” she exclaimed, “I get to see a proper vet…” she turned and gave me a nasty look. I rolled my eyes and closed the door.

He's Back!

“James!” I breathed, “What… what are you doing here?” I turned to Ace who was standing with his mouth open.
“I’m sorry Scarlett,” James said bursting into tears. I went to run towards him but I stopped.
“That guy,” I said, my eyes scanning around my apartment, “he’s not… here… is he?” I asked nervously.
“Of course he’s not, I left him Scarlett! I left him for you guys!” I suddenly felt my heart drop and I ran towards him my arms wide. I pulled him in tight and hugged him whilst he cried. I wanted to cry too but I was too much in shock. I pulled away from him and looked into his eyes.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” I smiled. He nodded slowly and sniffed.
“I'm sorry Scarlett, I didn't mean for all of thi-“
“Hush, it’s not your fault okay, don’t apologize!” I said sternly looking into his eyes. He nodded. “Have you told Billie, she’s been so worried, Ace” I said turning to him, “grab my phone please.”
“No! not yet, please, I can’t face her right now, that’s why I came to you, she’s gonna be mad at me Scarlet, she won’t forgive me!” he sobbed. I looked confused.
“Why not? This isn't your fault you-“
“I’m a drug addict Scarlet!” James exclaimed. I shook my head.
“James it’s not your fault!”
“It is! I took the drugs, I wanted them!” he wept clinging to me. I couldn't speak, I didn't know what to say or do. I then felt Ace’s arm rest on my shoulder.
“Here mate,” Ace smiled, passing him some tissues and a glass of water. James smiled through his tears and took the tissue from Ace. He wiped away the tears which were streaming down his cheeks. I backed away in disbelief and confusion. I took a deep breath and re-gained composure.
“Sit down James, I need to know everything…”

James told me the story of how he and Rodger met, (that was the dick heads name). Apparently they had met only two weeks before Christmas at a gay bar which I knew James visited often, I’d even been there. According to James he was a really sweet and genuine guy and he was totally smitten by him (he was definitely drunk then) and by the next morning they had agreed to be a couple.
“I knew it was fast, but, he was just so perfect you know, he had great looks, great personality, I really clicked with him,” he said softly, I nodded my head. “But then he started getting all jealous, he said now we were a couple I had to stay with him like ALL the time, I told him about Christmas and he told me I wasn't allowed to go with you guys…. I didn't know what to do,”
“But, he let you, you were with us?” I asked, frowning.
“I lied to him Scarlett, I told him my mum was dying and I had to visit her to say good bye!”
“Wow, James, that’s crazy…”
“I had to! I didn't want to let you down! I just wanted to be away from him, but then I felt so guilty… I lied to him.”
“James, we would have understood we would have helped you, you didn't tell us!” I burst.
“Do you think it was easy not to! I wanted to have a good time without even thinking about him, I thought I was free, but he was waiting for me at the train station and then-“
“He found out?” I asked softly. He nodded.
“He messaged ALL my family on Facebook asking about my mum, he even called my mum!”
“Oh James, I’m so sorry you had to go through it alone, but what about the drugs?”
“Well, after we met… well you know… we were experimenting. I mean I didn't want to take them! But he told me it would make it fun and less painful.”
“What less painful?” I asked, feeling slightly uneasy.
“We went to this place and there were loads of men there and they… I don’t wanna talk about it Scarlett! I took the drugs, it took the pain away, but I couldn't stop, that’s it okay, but it’s done now!” James shouted suddenly bursting into tears again. I stared into space and rubbed his back.
“Scarlet,” I heard Ace say; I’d almost forgotten he was still here. “Do you want me to go?” He asked trying to smile. I nodded slowly.
“I’m sorry about tonight…” I said kinda awkwardly remembering what we were doing before.
“It’s fine, if you need anything, just call yeah?” he smiled, walking towards the door. He then turned around. “Bye James,” he called. James lifted up his head and sniffed.
“I’m sorry we couldn't have met under better circumstances,” he laughed softly.
Once Ace had left we sat in silence.
“He’s a nice guy,” James then said.
“Yeah, he’s great,” I smiled looking down and picking at my nail.
“Have you sealed the deal?” he asked.
“Were not exclusive,” I smiled. He nodded slowly. “So what happens now?” I asked.
“I’m not sure, I’m worried Scarlett.” I reached out and held his hand.
“He’s not gonna hurt you anymore, Billie and I, we won’t let him,” I said firmly.
“Can you call Billie now?” he then asked reaching out for the class of water.


Billie was round in ten minutes. She was in tears and hugging James. James didn't tell her all he had told me and I understood why. Billie was completely anti-drugs. Her father had been addicted to cocaine and heroin when she was little and she had a pretty bad childhood because of it. She had been on dozens of campaigns and even protests against drug use. Even though Billie would have understood I could see why James would have felt uneasy telling her. I made us all a cup of tea and we sat in silence watching the fireworks on the TV. It was coming up to 12’clock but neither one of us felt excited. James had stopped crying but there was a sense of sadness in the room still.
“It must be freezing out there,” I said watching the crowd of people surrounding the south bank to watch the fireworks. They both nodded and mumbled in agreement. “You know, we shouldn't be miserable, James is here now and it’s a new year!” I exclaimed. Billie looked over at me and smiled.
“You right, but just can’t believe someone would be so cruel,” she sighed.
“Billie, I’m not going to ruin New Year’s,” James said standing up, “Rodger would have wanted that, and that’s why we are going to celebrate!” He laughed. “Quick, get the champagne, look us old laddies drinking tea on fricking New Years!” He laughed. I could tell he was forcing himself to be happy, but maybe it was better than him feeling sorry for himself. I got up and grabbed a bottle of champagne from the fridge along with three glasses. James took them and filled them up. “Here, here,” he smiled passing us both a glass. He then sat down between us and placed his arms around us and pulled us close.
“10….9….8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!” The TV screamed. Suddenly we all jumped up and drunk our champagne.
“Happy new year!” Billie smiled kissing James on the cheek.
“Happy new year you guys!” James laughed, giving me a huge hug. I smiled and for the first time felt I really did have James back, even if getting over this would take a long, long time.

Risky Business...

After work I popped into the shops to buy something special for New Year’s. I still haven’t told anyone about my bisexual experience and I wasn't ready too either. I know I'm not attracted to girls, I had thought about it a lot since and I think I was mostly curious, I just wanted to see what kissing a girl would be like and even though she had put her hand up my skirt I wasn't expecting that so it wasn't entirely my fault. I bought a short little dress which was sequin on top and flowed into a black skirt at the bottom. As I tried it on I realised I haven't been to the gym in ages and I really needed to go, I needed to relief some stress and loose my after Christmas belly. I bought some fun costume jewellery and a new pair of black high heels before returning home.

As I walked in my apartment my phone started to ring. I dropped my shopping bags and rummaged around inside my bag for my phone. It was Billie.
“Hello,” I smiled, holding my mobile up with my shoulder.
“Hey, what you doing for New Years?” she asked.
“I’m going out with Ace,” I smiled, picking up my shopping bags and putting them into my bed.
“Sucks, I’m bored… I wonder what James is doing….”
“Don’t think about it Billie,” I said gently.
“You know I've been calling him every day hoping he will change his mind and pick up…” she said. I smiled sadly. “Anyway, where you going?” she asked. I was kinda glad she changed topic.
“I don’t know actuslly, he said he would pick me up and the rest is a surprise…”
“Ooo, what are you going to wear?” she asked.
“Well I bought this little dress from Topshop, hold on I will text you a photo to see what you think once I've got it on,” I smiled feeling excited about this date, “what do you think I should bring, I really don’t know what we are going to be doing but… I wanna be prepared,” I laughed, taking my new stuff out of the bags.
“Hmm well I know what you’re defiantly going to need…”
“What?” I asked curiously, taking off my work clothes.
“You’re going to need some hot underwear,” she laughed, “I've checked him out on Facebook and I think he’s a black and leather kinda guy,” I heard her giggle. I felt myself blush.
“You found him on Facebook!? I haven’t even done that yet, how?!” I asked rushing over to my computer in my underwear.
“Yeah, I just typed in Ace, I think we must have a mutual friend or something because he was top of the list…”
“Bills, there’s loads of Ace’s!” I laughed, scrolling down the long list of names, “how did you know the one you found was him anyway?” I asked.
“His occupation is a vet and he looks like the type you’d find attractive, Asian, muscular, dark haired-“
“Okay, okay, you found him, now send me over the link to his profile, I wanna see!” I laughed. A few minutes later I got a Facebook message from Billie containing a link to his profile. I clicked on it and then I suddenly wished Id waited till after the date. What if I found something I didn’t like and the whole date was ruined? Luckily though it was okay, he just had a few photos, messages from friends and I also noticed he was into gaming which was fine; I used to love Pokémon as a kid too. I smiled looking at his photo, I wanted to send him a friend request but then I thought that would be kinda creepy as I’m just about to go on a date with him. I closed down my computer and continued to get ready.

I styled my straightened hair into a tight, high ponytail and winged my black eye liner. I wore a dark lipstick and tried to contour my face, no matter how many YouTube videos I watched I STILL couldn't quite get it right but I did the best I could. Thinking of what Billie said I wanted to go for the sexy, sultry look. I slipped on my little dress and wore a black fur jacket over it. I was just touching up my make-up when I heard my apartment buzzer go off.
I met Ace at the bottom of the stairs. He looked kinda surprised when he saw me but he gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.
“I’m not gonna lie,” he smiled getting into the taxi, “you look really hot tonight” he laughed. I smiled trying not to blush.
“Thank you, are you going to tell me where we are going now?” I smiled, looking into his eyes. I was DEFINITELY more attracted to men. He smiled.
“Were going scuba diving…” he said. My eyes widened and my mouth dropped. Suddenly he burst out laughing.
“Your face! I can’t believe you fell for it!” I suddenly caught on and slapped his leg.
“Don’t be mean!” I laughed, finding it funny now, there wasn't even anywhere to go scuba diving I felt dumb for being so gullible.
“No, no I’ll show you, it’s a great place, you’ll love it,” he smiled. I was getting even more curious now, what if I was over dressed? Or under dressed? That would be embarrassing. Ace looked smart yet sort of causal too. He was wearing a white shirt with a casual black blazer and fitted dark grey jeans. I was checking him out when the taxi stopped. “Were here,” he smiled, opening the taxi door. I drew my breath slightly nervous.

The place was AMAZING. I couldn't believe I’d never even heard of it before! It was an Asian restaurant called Inamo in Soho but instead of being oriental it was completely modern and futuristic. Inside it looked like space ship with space-age pod lights hanging over us and electric touch-screen tables which allowed you to change the colour of your table cloth AND play mini games against each other. The menus were built into the table which you touched to order what you wanted. The orders were sent straight to the kitchen so it saved loads of time and was really convenient. I felt like I had been swept into the future.
“Do you like it?” Ace smiled, watching me tapping away at the table.
“Yes! This is so much fun, wanna play battleships?” I laughed.
“I thought you’d never ask,” he smiled. We played a game of battle ships before I began to get hungry. I tapped my way through the menu and then ordered Korean beef and noodle salad while Ace ordered Hot Stone Rib Eye. The food came extremely quickly and we both tucked in.
“Mmm! This is soo good!” I moaned shoving another piece of beef into my mouth; seriously it was the best beef I’d EVER tasted. Ace nodded and agreement. After dinner we ordered some drinks and got chatting.
“So, any news on James yet?” Ace asked. I shook my head.
“Nope,” I replied. There was a short silence, I think he didn't know what to say, it had been 4 days now…
“You never told me what you’re into?” he then asked… “Hobby wise.”
“I like going to the gym I guess… you know thinking about it, I don’t really have a hobby, that kinda sucks doesn't it?” I laughed.
“Hmm well you do have a busy job,” he shrugged. I nodded sipping my sake martini.
“What do you like doing in your free time? Besides playing the guitar,” I asked.
“Well mostly I play games,” he smiled.
“That’s cool, like Fifa? GTA? Or are you a war craft kinda guy?” I smiled.
“Well I play all types of games really, but I guess I prefer more strategic, simulation games.” He told me. I smiled watching him smile as he spoke about games, I could tell he was really passionate about it. “You know, before I decided I wanted to be a vet I really wanted to be a game designer…” he trailed off.
“Oh that’s cool, you must be really passionate about them,” I smiled.
“Yeah, a little too much,” he laughed, “I’m a huuuge nerd.” We both laughed.
“I used to love games too when I was little, but I guess I grew out of it,” I noticed his face dropped slightly, “not that I mean your childish for playing games!” I burst, trying not to make him feel bad. He laughed.
“You know, we should get a desert,” I smiled. I was having a great time and I wanted to get to know him more. We ordered a cheese cake to share.
“So do you visit your family often?” I smiled.
“Not as much now, when I first came here I was extremely home sick, but now I’m used to it I guess, were you born here?” he asked.
“No, no, I’m actually only half Pilipino, my dad’s English so I was born here. Him and my mother met when he was on holiday over there… my mum got pregnant and well… here I am!” I smiled. He laughed. We continued talking until I noticed him start smirking mysteriously again.
“What?” I asked, raising my eye brow.
“Let’s get out of here,” he grinned, signalling the waiter for the bill.

Once we had managed to find a taxi everything was a blur. Before I knew it his hand was on my face and we were kissing like the world was about to come to an end. He rubbed my thigh as we kissed, I felt myself blush as his hand slipped higher and higher up my leg. I heard the taxi driver cough and I pulled my lips away.
“Sorry” I mumbled, reaching down for my purse. I had always felt sorry for the taxi men who had to deal with over excited customers and how I had become one.
“I got this,” Ace smiled, pulling out a 10 pound note for the taxi driver.

Once we were back into the apartment building we were back kissing again. He was a super sexy kisser and his hands were all over my body. “Come on!” I laughed, grabbing his hands and pulling him up the stairs, “we can’t do it here!”  I said looking around the row of apartment doors.
“Hmm, maybe we could,” he laughed, pulling me back to him and pushing me back against the railing on the stairs. He placed his hands on the bar either side of me so I couldn't escape. I looked up at him and smiled. We continued to kiss harder and harder and I felt his hand slide up my leg and under my skirt. I moaned softly as he rubbed his hand over my knickers, gently moving them to some side as his fingers entered me. I gasped and bit my bottom lip trying not to be too loud. I was just getting carried away and a little bit too excited, (who knew getting turned on in public could feel so sexy?) when I heard a door unlocking.
“Shit!” I laughed, pulling away from him as quick as I could and running up the stairs. He laughed and ran after me. I began searching in my handbag for my keys while Ace kissed my neck and ran his hands up and down my body. I managed to unlock the door, feeling completely weak at the knees. The door burst open and we both fell in laughing. I reached for the light switch and suddenly I screamed. Someone was there...

Strange Experience...

The next day work felt even longer. We had an emergency with a dog who had been hit by a car and rabbit who had been missing for a month and needed a check over once they had found him in their next door neighbor's shed. The dog was surprisingly making a full recovery even though the owners were completely irresponsible and didn't even own a lead. It was a puppy for dog sake! The Rabbit was severely malnourished. Luckily rabbits can gain weight pretty easily when they are on a weight gain diet. I recommended the owners to feed her Oxbow Critical Care which is a type of recovery food that is high in calories which will help build up her weight again. I also suggested feeding her bananas which I would not normally recommend for rabbits as bananas were very high in sugar but since their rabbit was underweight it would help speed up the process. I filed down the rabbits teeth and told her to give us a call if there are any problems or if she’s not eating. She thanked me and left. During the rest of the day I done a few check-ups and finished the online phone books. I left at half seven today and stopped by the pizza take away to grab a pizza. I was just leaving when I got a text from Ace. I hadn't heard from him in a few days and thought maybe he had decided not to continue dating after all the drama, to be honest I would't have blamed him.

Hey Scarlett, sorry I haven’t text, works been crazy, fancy going out for New Year’s? x

I smiled to myself and once I was back in my apartment I replied. With all the James drama I had lost track of time and hadn't realised New Year’s was so close.

Sure, 8pm? x

He replied almost instantly saying he would pick me up in the taxi and the rest was a surprise. I was just wondering what it could be when I heard my phone buzz. This time it was Billie.
“Hello?” I smiled half nervous half excited.
“Scarlett, I’m sorry I've been a shit friend... can I come over?” I smiled, finally!

Billie arrived 10 minutes later. I had to re-heat the pizza as it was beginning to go cold and I grabbed a bottle of cold white wine from my fridge. She walked in and sat down on my sofa. I placed the pizza in front of her and we ate in silence for at bit. I watched her stuff her face and I smiled.
“You smelt the pizza didn't you…” I laughed raising my eye brow.
“You do order the best pizza...” She smiled.
“Billie, I've really missed this… I've really missed YOU,” I said softly looking down.
“I know Scarlett, I just didn't want to hang out with you all happy while James is… not with us anymore….” She was acting like he was dead and it made me cringe.
“I know Bills, but your my best friend, I've needed someone to talk to, I almost made out with a girl!” Suddenly she started chocking on the pizza she was eating.
“What!?” she burst.
“My neighbour… she’s bi, she lost her cat and I found him for her and when she came over she got a little close and-“
“Are you sure she wasn't just being friendly…?” Billie frowned.
“What? No! She told me I was beautiful and tried to kiss me Billie! Not only that but she’s engaged to this super hot guy and they live in the apartment opposite me!” I exclaimed.
“Wow Scarlett, that’s crazy, it’s like a love triangle! He loves the girl, the girl loves you and you love the guy!” she said laughing.
“I don’t love him and she doesn't love me.” I snapped.
“Clam down, I was joking, seriously though, have you ever kissed a girl before?” she asked with a smirk.
“Billie, I would have told you!” I said rolling my eyes.
“Well, maybe not, I know lots of girls who have made out with their girlfriends, it’s not uncommon you know Scarlett!” She laughed.
“Well you go over and make out with her then!” I laughed.
“Ooo, which room number?” she joked. 

Once she left I felt sooo much happier. I had Billie back! I couldn't believe not having my best friend in my life could make me soo miserable. Even though we had known each other since we were 15 we had never had a serious falling out before. I was just turning off my laptop when I heard knocking at the door.
“What have you left behind this time?” I laughed opening the door. “Oh,” I smiled blushing. It was Jane. She looked confused. “Sorry my friend Billie was just over…” she stood their awkwardly.
“Your friend hu?” she said rather rudely. I looked confused.
“Yeah… my friend...” I replied in the same rude tone.
“I was just bringing you this…” she said, handing me something wrapped up in tissue paper. I looked confused and took it.
“Do you, wanna come inside?” I asked, feeling like I had to at least invite her inside. She smiled.
“Sure, you can open it now by the way.” I stepped inside and watched as she sat down on the sofa. I sat on the sofa opposite her and begun to rip open the present she had given me.
“Oh,” I smiled, “thank you!” it was a new mug, a pretty one too, definitely better than the old one. It was a pale pink and had large white polka-dots all over it.
“It’s okay, I just thought I’d buy you a new one since Tommy made you drop your old one.”
“Oh, it’s okay, it was my fault for being all jumpy!” I smiled, putting the new mug down on the coffee table between us.
“I remember you said you get lonely,” she then got up and sat down next to me. I felt suddenly nervous. “If you ever want someone to come over… I’m always here,” she looked at me and smiled. She then gently put her hand on my leg. I looked up at her, my eyes wide. She smiled.
“Don’t look so worried!” she laughed. I pushed myself back a little and laughed. I tried to relax.
“How’s Tommy?” I smiled.
“Oh he’s great! I’m not letting him out ever again!” she laughed.
“That’s great, I've been thinking about getting a pet, I might look in some pet shelters, I want to get a kitten-“
“Oh my god! Kittens are soo cute, what would you name it?” she burst smiling.
“I don’t know yet really,” I said.
“Hmm, Lola, Whiskers,  Fudge, Timmy… Oh Timmy and Tommy!” she laughed, I laughed too starting to feel relaxed. Suddenly without any warning she lent forward and pressed her lips against mine. Something about the kiss felt nice so I lent back on the sofa as she kissed me harder and harder. Her hand slid under my top and towards my boobs. I wasn't wearing a bra and her cold hands groped my breasts. I watched her and blushed. I then felt her other hand slide down my pajama bottoms and slide in between my legs. I gasped. I really wasn't expecting that.
“Your wet…” she smiled. I suddenly felt embarrassed, I wasn't Bisexual? What the fuck was happening?! I suddenly pushed her away.
“Whoa?!” she said, getting up. I quickly grabbed my shirt and covered my naked breasts.
“Get out, please!” I shouted.
“Scarlett, you were turned on, I felt you getting-”
“No! You forced yourself on me; I don’t want this anymore I want you to leave!” I felt my cheeks begin to burn up.
“Your weird, when are you going to accept your sexuality?!” She shouted.
“What? You’re the one who’s about to marry someone and your forcing yourself on other girls, just leave!” I screamed. She stormed out and slammed the door. I couldn't believe what I had done. Was a bisexual? I had never been sexually attracted to a girl before. I went to call Billie but then I stopped. I felt myself shaking and I was too confused to tell anyone yet. I couldn't understand what had happened…